June 4, 2011

Sunny with a chance I might scream

I hate talking about the weather. I should clarify: I loathe talking about the weather. It is the most inane topic and I pity the fool who tries to engage me in a conversation on the matter. I am also quite passionate about other people around me discussing the weather. It's silly and boring and it doesn't make sense to me...at all. What's more, WE CAN'T CONTROL IT PEOPLE SO JUST DEAL AND MOVE ON.  (In all honesty, I did warn you.)

But I am curious. Why do you all seem to freakin' looooooooove talking about the weather? Is the topic that scintillating? What is it about sun, rain, sleet and snow that sucks you all into this mind numbing topic? (I'm bordering on passing judgment here, aren't I?) What I really don't understand is why people try so hard to control an element that is utterly uncontrollable. It seems as if you all think that sending enough energy to the weather will make it happen - i.e. the snow dance. Why??? Unless you are an evil villain with a weather machine in your garage I implore you to knock it the hell off.

And what really chaps my hide? Complaining about the weather. Guess what? You live where you live and the weather patterns, for the most part are established (lets save the global warming chat for another day). Yes, the spring lasts longer in Seattle and we had a La Nina this year so it was colder. Move or shut up because if I hear one more person bitch I might end up on the evening news.

But wait! Yesterday the sun came out (and so did all the inappropriate clothing for a whopping 60+ degree day.) And today it was even warmer, almost 80 in some spots, so I'm just waiting...for someone to complain that it's too hot. You know it will happen. Mother Nature can't seem to keep you weather whiners happy. It's as if a little bit of Goldilocks resides in each and every one of you; you're not happy until it's "just right."

It never will be. Never. Ever. So stop talking about the weather because I really don't want to end up in prison.


Richard said...

Gee, you know, Jayne, it's hot here in Denton, TX. It'll be in the 90s all this week.

Anonymous said...

You obviously haven't had a need or an opportunity to actually be "in touch" with the weather. Once a person engages their environment and becomes involved with their natural surroundings, the weather emerges as prime. If you were to live near the shoreline, for example and depend upon the forest and the sea as a place to live, to move through and across, you would begin to see the weather as an associate, as a constant influence, a partner of sorts--- sometimes cranky, sometime accomodating. Good luck. I hope that at some time in the future, you will have the good fortune to take your first steps into the natural world where the weather is an atmosphere that envelopes you----all the way from the beginning and through the end.

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